I feel so lonely

I feel so lonely in this world. I need someone I can talk about what is in my heart, what is in my soul, what is in my mind. I need someone? Is it you? Please drop me a line... Thanks.

Just a Game

Somebody sent me this link with a game: http://www.poweroversoftware.com/GameIntro.htm
I find it so challenging and entertaining is the same time.

I got far enough with the warmup: http://www.poweroversoftware.com/gamet/ until I got stuck with the colorful question: " + - - = ? "
As for the main game - I still can pass over the first page: " The first ones are important! "

Finding something

Zen saying: "If you want to find something, you need to stop looking". Deep inside me I feel that is true. You become so focused and busy on the looking "process" that with time you forget what you were looking for in the first place.

Drop comparing and life is really beautiful

We define happiness by the things we have that are "better" than what the other people around us have. We feel happier if our neighbor is doing "worse" than us. Why?

The Goal of Life

Do we have a goal in life that we have to accomplish? I mean, come on, let's recognize it, we all are going to die, sooner or later. What happens when we die? I don't know, but that is not my point. My point is: "Is there something that I and you have to do before we die?" I mean, although I don't know what happens after we die, I don't think it is the end, I don't think our being disappears just like that. It might get through a transformation, or it will be "transferred" somewhere well, but we don't disappear. The question is: is there something in this life that can influence what happens when we die?

I tried many things, I hoped many things, but nothing happened. I feel that everything I do is in vain. Nothing happens! But then I realized that maybe I don't have to actively look after something, because the fact that I am looking after something, might create this hope for now, and the illusion later that I did it, I found it. But then it is just an illusion in my mind. Or a consolation at least, that I've done everything I could, and how can I be wrong? Wrong is the root of the idea itself. I need to stop for something. I need to stop creating illusion. I don't need to do anything. Just be, watch, breath, sleep. Melt into life.

Making life a game - is it possible?

Can I remove any belief; can I have no prejudice? Can I make life a game and not a purpose? Can I make life a fun, and not goal oriented? Can I make life pure love and not a business?

I want to be able to do it. But it is so hard, because I'm caught in the notion of life that people created around me, in school, at work, everywhere.

Should I go hide somewhere? But where? Maybe in the mountains where it is hard to be reached...

Learning

We are taught to imitate. We are taught to learn more and more. We gather so much information in our mind and it takes over us. But there is on thing that we don't know: "Learning brings no transformation to our being. The transformation of one's being comes through some other door, not through the doors of mind". Can that door be "the experience"?

The Way

The way is to be silent, to experience in one's self that which is always the observer, and never the observed; to know the knower, and forget the known.

Enlightenment

Enlighened means you have realized who you are. I am aware of the things around me but I still can't see inside me, understand me. It is a big struggle.

My Neighbor’s Grass is Greener

There is this saying that “My neighbor’s grass is always greener”. It is all about desire, desire to have something that you don’t have yet. The problem with desire is that it never stops. You want something that you see today and you fight for it, you struggle for it, until you have it and once you have it, desire strikes again for something that your “neighbor” just got. Desire is the root of unhappiness. How do you stop desire? You can’t actually. Trying to deny it, to repress it, it will make it even higher. Look at children. Try to tell your child not do something. He will start crying and he won’t accept anything else. He will wait until you will not be around, and still do what you told him not to do. Repression is not the solution. Repression creates something more dangerous – the obsession. The solution is to understand the futility of desire. Just watch your desire getting born, getting higher. Just watch yourself trying to accomplish the desire, and at the moment when desire is accomplished, contemplate carefully that moment, and say “Now what?” You will see that there is nothing there. You didn’t realize anything. Your mind will instantly pick something else for you to urge for having. The desire will never stop, unless you understand there is no point in it.